It’s Not About What You Can’t Do, It’s About What You Can Do

Day 2: Tuesday, June 10, 2014: Lots of Sweat and Still Hungry

I tossed and turned last night. I think partially it may have had something to do with my nerves of starting up at Crossfit again, but aside from that I felt pretty good this morning.

I choose to blend my shake with ice to make it more substantial and feel like more of a meal. It turned out to be a delicious success! I opted to keep it to plan with ice and water whereas my boyfriend Greg added some berries to his.

I am sitting here writing part of this post when I should be getting ready for Crossfit. God help me.

Let me state the obvious here, Crossfit is hard. It’s probably the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I went today praying my strong cardiovascular platform as a cycling instructor would carry me: NOPE. It was still as hard as I remember it being.

At the end of the WOD (workout of the day) as I tallied up my numbers for reps and the coach wrote them on the white board, there it was: How I measured up to everyone else, emblazoned for all of the Studio City Crossfit to see. I am not going to lie. I felt like crap. I’m a fitness instructor. Why am I towards the bottom of this list (no, not last, thank you very much)?! Shouldn’t I be higher?! Wait, come to think of it–I know some people cheated! Finally, this dialogue in my head was interrupted by something I recently said in my yoga class:

It’s not about what you can’t do, it’s about what you can do.

Not only did I show up, but I did the best I could after taking months off from Crossfit. My boyfriend killed it and took second in the WOD but he’s just not human and I am not him. Yes, Crossfit is hard. It’s supposed to be. Like anything else in life, the hard is what makes it great. Every day I show up for myself is one day closer to a stronger, better, more fit me.

So am I where I want to be? No.

But if I sat at home thinking about what I couldn’t do verses actually doing it, then I wouldn’t be making any progress–would I?

I became hungrier later today than yesterday, I am thinking that’s a good thing showing that my body is adjusting to the new nutrition program. I housed veggies and humus, some raw almonds and walnuts, drank lots of water, laid in the sun, and then took a yoga flow class. Pre and post class: I WAS STARVING. But then again, I also had 2+ hours of intense physical activity today which certainly contributed to my hunger.

Being mindful of a potentially epic meltdown from not eating, I hustled home after class and immediately made dinner: Chicken, brown rice, black beans, avocado, tomatoes, baby kale with a little olive oil, salt, pepper, and garlic. It was decent and filling. Though I will admit that some froyo would really hit the spot right now, I grabbed a glass of water and sat down to finish writing this. I am making moves and I am committed because it’s not about what I can’t do, it’s about what I can do.

Tomorrow we discuss commitment, oh lala.

2 thoughts on “It’s Not About What You Can’t Do, It’s About What You Can Do

  1. So proud of you honey bun… I went into Death Race mode a few weeks ago (leaning and muscling up), being very mindful of what and how much I am eating while still workout out at 11 intensity. The first few days were brutal and then…. The body starts to adjust.
    The biggest motivator is the first glimpse and feel of results. You want more of that high rather than the food high, and the cycle starts.
    Enjoy the process you gorgeous thing you!!!

    1. Thank you so much for leaving a comment and sharing your thoughts, Rachelanne. I love your ferocious intensity and strength. You are such an inspiration and beautiful soul. My body is not where it was, but I will not give up. I am going to keep working because the only way I know how is through :-) xo

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